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How Time Flies So Quickly…

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Time is a very interesting subject. To me anyways.

For example : It doesn’t seem to me that my grandson should be already be a month old. But he is.

They were for real asleep here too. ll while under the careful eye of her devoted boyfriend who also hs a 3yr boy hisself. She actually got almost a full 8hrs of sleep on this day. Baby Lukah was placed in his own lil bed, but only after he fell asleep next to his momma.
She was only pretending to be sleep in this picture. They are so comfy looking ain’t they?
No worries ppl!! Don’t freak out because they was asleep in the same bed. It was only a 20 minute nap. Plus her boyfriend was there watching over them both. He’s the one who took the picture before putting him in his own bed. I have explained the dangers of letting your new born sleep in the bed with the parent. I tolds her there was always a possibility she could roll over om him if she was in a dead sleep.
He goes for check up next week. Mercedes asked me how much I thought he’d weigh. I guessed about 10-12lbs. Idk but we’ll see who was right and who was closer.

She had plans on moving in with her boyfriend after she had Lukah, but she never told me. Not even a clue. When I asked her why, her response pissed me the hell off.

She said to me that she didn’t wanna tell me because she didn’t wanna make me mad. WTF? Why would I get mad that my daughter is now not only a legal adult, a new mom herself, and for wanting to start her life with the guy she’s current;y dating and has moved in with? I asked her that also. Her reply blew my mind you guys. She told me that everyone else she’s told about it has always said something negetive about the choices she made. I told her straight up, “FUCK THEM!” Haters are always gonna hate. Especially when they see someone doing better than they are they don’t particularly care for. It still pisses me off that ppl actually straight out told her not to go on and live her life with her son, step-son, and damn good boyfriend. He’s already given her a car so she can start practising driving. She knows how, but she has severe anxiety when she’s driving when other cars are coming towards her in the opposite lane, and driving on the interstate. They live on a small farm and he’s got some farm animals like horses, cows and maybe hickens. Not sure about the chickens.

I asked her if she was gonna go by my house so that Greg got to spend a lil time with Lukah before they left. At first she said no. They were just gonna dip out. Then I told her how bad his feelings woud be hurt if she up and did that to him when he was usually the only one to ever take her to all those baby doctor appointments she had to go to every month. Then the closer to the end of her trimester she reached the more frequent the appointments became. She would have broke his heart in such a bad way, that I don’t think they’d ever have the closeness they now have with one another. Since her father has been out actin a damn fool, her and my husband have became very close. She introduces him as her step-dad now as to where before it was just ‘Greg”.

It went all through me. Any parent out there whose child was finally grown and has basically raised themselves because either one or the other parent was absent (that one being me when I was locked up). However, her father was also MIA. He traveled from state to state building hotels. Staying gone for weeks and probably months at a time. I remember my first trip to Louisville, Ky. to go pick my daughter up from one of the hotels/motels he had a little more work to do on, and another one he was building in the city. It was also the same day I got to see my son walk across the stage and graduate. I’m so blessed to of gotten released from prison when I did. Otherwise I’d never of had the opportunity to witness that for myself. Being able to say ‘I was there’.

She moved in with my husband and I, and they quickly butted heads. She’d been used to doing her own thing basically the entire time he had her. From 5yrs old until she moved in with me December 2021. She’s been a daddy’s girl all her life. That will never change, even though he has. Not for the better either. You guys please keep B in your prayers. He needs all he an get of them even if he thinks he doesn’t. He’s the father of my child, I’ll always care for his well being. What worries me te most about him is his mental health.

I’ll save that for another story time. Woke up because I can’t seem to sleep tonight. Insomnia is knocking on my door hard asf tonight. Time to put this piece to rest and get it posted. Good night you guys. Or good morning to others.

About Post Author

BooBoo

I'd rather read a good book, VS watching the movie made from it on TV. Most thoughts on that are 'why'. Well, my answer for that is that there aren't any limitations to your imagination. Therefore, when I'm reading an action packed thriller that I can't put down or stop turning the pages of is because the details are written by the author describing the scene/situation with such clarity, that I think it's far better than what anyone can visibly see on TV. That being my opinion only, I'm sure millions and billions of avid readers out there agree with me 100% on that reason alone. I've always had an active imagination growing up. I'd use the almost empty cans of shaving cream my dad would give me, as the whipped cream on top of the mud pies I made.Of course dad got the first one. After all, he did give me the topping. I was very versatile also. I was the biggest tom boy of a little girl you'd ever see one day. To dividing Barbie clothes between me and my older sister (when I was lucky enough to get her to play with me). I had to play by her rules though. Perks of being the older sibling I guess. I loved playing with the Hot Wheel's cars in the dirt. Making race tracks and underground tunnels I'd dig out for them. Sometimes my dad would be outside with me showing me all kinds of different things I could pretend to do when playing cars. I have one day in particular that stands out among the rest. It was when I learned to do the underground tunnels for the cars to go through. He showed me by taking a simple stick off the ground and using it like a tool to push the dirt out from one side to the other. It wasn't a tunnel without keeping the top part intact. I acted like there was a cave-in, and then accidents, crashing the cars together. No one ever got hurt in my imagination though, just the cars got hurt. Growing up with a sister 6-years older than me taught me lots of things, both good and bad. If I kept her secrets, she kept mine. And the only reason I even had any secrets was because she allowed me to. I got to sneak and smoke in her bedroom at night after our parents went to bed. I had to be very quiet because I got caught most of the time. But I was always caught by our momma. And then all she made me do was get back in bed. I came from a poor family so anything name brand wasn't known to me for a long time. I was bullied and made fun of all throughout my school years. It doesn't matter which year you pick. From the 1st grade, all the way through high school. I know that's terrible to have to admit, but I think it'd be even worse having to admit to being the bully. I swore to myself I'd never treat anyone the way those kids treated me and made me feel. It bothered me so bad I'd dream about standing up for, and actually fighting over other kids getting bullied. I woke up all of a sudden one morning after punching the lights out of a bully in my dream. When I really punched the headboard and made my knuckles bleed. Come on! When a child is taking on the burden of other bullied kids, you know that's a heavy burden to bear. It was also very hard on me. I never talked about it to my parents though. Yeah, they knew. But back then no one really knew what to do about that problem like they do now. Or, well, think they do. I've been in counseling since starting school. I can't remember a day going by without me seeing the school guidance counselor. Shout out to Mrs. Reeves though, at Lone Oak High School. She made the biggest impression on me as far as wanting to help other kids like me. The bullies were actually the kids who came from well-to-do families. Kids who never knew what it was like to experience the disappointment of being told 'No'. Or that there wasn't enough money to buy what they wanted. Kids that figured there wasn't anything better to do except make fun of the less fortunate to get them through their day or to have a conversation piece. The anger and hatred that built up inside of me was, and still is undescribable. The thoughts they caused me to have. Picturing the tables being turned and the bad things said back to them, bad things being done back to them. It only made me feel better on the inside. I've been asked by numerous doctors in my life if I'm suicidal. I've answered no, being completely honest each time. But never have they asked if I've felt homicidal! I know, scary right? The outcome of such thoughts is what triggered the start of mass school shootings. Coming into adulthood was strange territory for me as well, and actually caused me a lot of uncomfortable times, knowing things I knew I could now do but never felt comfortable ever talking about. Even with my sister, the person I was closest to, I couldn't open up and freely talk about anything of the sexual nature. I guess because bad things have happened to me on more than one occasion when I was still very much an innocent child. With me hiding such horrid things from my parents, along with everyone else, I felt I couldn't talk about the good kind of sex either. Man did that ever set me back, keeping me immature of certain things I should've known already but didn't. Because in my mind I was still that child who was hurt in a bad way. They were called 'Red Touches' back then. What we were taught to call them in school anyways. Then just when I was becoming independent and living on my own, learning to stand up for myself in a way that would make my sister proud of me, I lost her. That caused me to go into a deep depression I didn't come out of for many years afterwards. March 29, 2003 changed my life forever. I lost my 2-year old nephew that night to a raging house fire. My sister passed 17 days later in the burn unit in Vanderbilt, Tennessee. However, if you've read 'My Story', a post on my blog. Then you'll know that in order for me to know what I now know, and to be the person that I now am, all of the bad shit had to happen first or else I wouldn't have caught and held onto the message so vital for me to have acquired in my life. Helping the less fortunate. Being someone's somebody they can depend on being there when they need them the most. After receiving confirmation that my nephew didn't suffer, not for one second in that house fire... Was I able to let that burden go, only to let in that oxygen, that life support I desperately needed to save myself from a lifetime of misery. Even though I know my sister, Jennifer, isn't physically here to cheer and root me on. I know without a shadow of a doubt, her and Lil Jesse (my nephew) are both doing so from Heaven today, and everyday that follows. If you're suffering from addiction of any kind and you want or need someone to talk to I'm a damn good listener! My contact information is listed on my contact page. Please call, reach out for support. You're not alone no matter what negative thoughts are telling you that you are. God is always there for you as well. If you'd like to learn more about Jesus and how He died to save us, don't hesitate to ask. I'll share what I know is all good, and positive about God. Whom I choose to call my higher power. If you don't believe in God, then the subject will not be pushed. EVER! If you're battling mental health issues and feel alone like no one knows what you feel like. Then I'm here to tell you there's billions of people out there that will share with you that they too, feel just like you do. Hit me up on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. All of my accounts should be connected to my website. If you're waiting on me to respond and it's been a while since you tried getting in touch with me, then by all means be more persistent and bug the shit out of me. Make me see your messages. I will eventually and I'll always reply when I can. This is the best I think I've written in this 'about me' section. It's the most I've opened up publicly I know that. I'm open minded, I keep it 100 all of the time, even if it's something I don't like myself, or for others, I still have to keep it 100 with myself in order for me to keep it that way with everyone else. I hope this told everyone a little bit about me, maybe more than I originally intended. But it's all accurate and up to date with where I'm at in my life right now. Thank you all and God Bless
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